Dating couples advice
I learned this lesson the hard way when I started dating a friend in high school.
Not only were we good friends, but our families were also extremely close and had been for years.
And yes, we got together as a result of being such close friends, and she is the best friend I'll ever have. Suddenly, the small daily troubles don't matter as much (work stuff, daily stress, etc.) because there's a much bigger picture to what we want from our life together. Now…not so much.__Are they ever OK (in the beginning) or is it better to lay it all on the table? I'm not saying you need to wear your heart on your sleeve from day one, but the only foundation for a relationship is if both people are honest with themselves and honest with each other.
How have you changed in your relationship over time? I'm trying not to sweat the small stuff of "today," because it's pretty trivial compared to what we want from our future. I made that mistake--Being in the same space but trying to keep things separate. This is now our home, our apartment, our rug that we both wipe our feet on. Not romantic I know, but that's where we're at right now. __Lynn: I mean, I wouldn't necessarily lay everything on the table on the first date, but be straight up about your wants and needs. Eric: The only place for playing games is exactly that: playing. What tips would you have for balancing work life, a social life and your love life?
Last year, my friends Lynn and Eric got married after more than nine years together (and even did the long distance thing for over a year in between). If I could I would go back and tell myself to get over myself and be a better woman to my man.
I assumed he’d be more into a woman who reminded him of Taylor Swift.Lynn: We were long distance for 15 months and then again for 19 months. If you realize that you're pretty much on the same page, that'll help. We can all be better people, and better in our relationships. Be YOUR best self, and not the one you think you're supposed to be. If you're not comfortable with who you are, how can you expect someone else to be comfortable with you for the rest of their life? We made it work by talking daily and by setting up a trip to see each other every 4-5 weeks. It takes effort and attention, and if it's meant to work out, it will. And you should be ENJOYING the time you spend together. The things that made sense from the beginning—as much as they do now—are cooking meals at home and sharing a bottle of wine, Mexican food and margaritas, couch time and football on Sunday afternoons, and always having FUN together. He was the same man that morning that I've known for 9 years, just a different title. For years, I've been happy knowing that I start each day with the woman I love and fall asleep next to her, too. " Don't stop making an effort just because you're married. Take her out on a date (you know, a REAL one, not just to your go-to neighborhood joint). But it's not about IMPRESSING, it's about making her feel truly special.We've always made it a point to be adventurous and do fun activities, whether it be skiing and holiday lights in the winter or road trips and amusement parks in the summer. __Lynn:__You know, people always ask me, "How's married life..? The only thing that has changed since getting married is our joint ability and more frequent longing to think long term. What do you think about playing games in a relationship? Ask me that 10 years ago, and I would have said sure, they're fine.